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Dr. Bill Jones | New York, New York
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New York Gospel Ministries
350 W 26th St
New York, NY 10001
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New York Gospel Ministries
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New York, NY 10009
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Where are the Men?
WEDNESDAY, MARCH 4, 2015
Posted by: New York Gospel Ministries | more..
151,660+ views | 1,520+ clicks
Where are the men? According to the ever reliable Wikipedia the ratio of men to women is nearly identical around the world. Looking at basic percentages the numbers are rarely much different than a 49/51 ratio, yet in churches and Christian circles the ratio is far different. Now before I go further, I want to clarify that I in no way see women as inferior to men – in fact, my experience has been that generally women far surpass men in nearly every area of life. I could list off topics that I’m referring to, such as academics, personal discipline, integrity, work ethic, and people skills, but my point is not that women are too good, or better than they should be. Rather, my point is that men have dropped the ball.

Why is it that in a visiting work team today there are three young ladies and one young man? Why is it that in one of the largest churches youth groups in Manhattan my friend testified “There are two guys and I’m one of them. All the rest are girls.” Why is it that when a group of girls from a nearby Christian college will commit to bring a certain number of girls to volunteer at the mission and will over deliver – promising three and bringing five, whereas a men’s group will promise “at least twenty” and will have five show up? Or on a different occasion “ten to fifteen” and have four deliver? Why is it that during college all of our community outreaches were filled with girls, and would have just a small percentage of men? I went on a nursing home outreach for several years and was the only guy for a full year before being able to convince other guys to join men. The first church “extension” group I became heavily involved with was the same. I was the only guy with a group of maybe five or six girls. It took years of constant recruiting to change the ratio and somewhat even things out.

My observations and experience are not unique or uncommon. Every church and ministry is looking for more male leadership yet very few places have enough, much less an excess of solid, dependable, hard working Christian men. Every Christian camp is looking for more male counselors yet has to turn away wonderful Christian young ladies.

Why? Why is this so common in our churches and organizations?

I have several ideas that may be behind it, and a solution to suggest. The things that I believe are causes are obvious – the vices that society consumes and that consume our society. But I believe there is a solution as well.

Intergenerational discipleship. A difficulty that must be kept in mind is that a person doesn’t instantly become a mentor or disciple-maker simply by waking up one day and deciding to care about other people. They also don’t automatically become a mentor by being old. It goes with the common age fallacy – that a person who is old is wise and a person who is young is foolish. In fact there are many old fools and a few young sages. The reality is that rightness and wisdom don’t automatically come with the turning of a calendar, but they come through conformity to the Word of God – and this doesn’t come by osmosis or drifting through life. The unfortunate reality is that it’s very difficult for a young man to find a wise, Godly mentor. Someone who “bleeds Bible” and speaks with wisdom like James describes – pure, peaceful, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.

It’s the same idea as the truth in missions that “just because you want to be a missionary doesn’t mean you get to be a missionary” – There is hard work and preparation that must come first.

So, what is the solution today?

Get to know God. Start today. Read your Bible. Open to a place like Philippians or Ephesians and read line by line, following the reasoning and argumentation that Paul is using. Pray, asking God to help you to understand what you’re reading. Do this day after day, reading through your Bible, humbly asking God for grace to receive His Word. In time you’ll find people around you, following you as you follow Christ. And after forty years you’ll really have something to say to them! But it’s in stark contrast to the man who wipes the dust off of his Bible each Sunday before church, yet spends untold hours pouring football scores and news headlines into his brain, and then when he’s sixty years old wonders why he has no young men looking to him for spiritual guidance and his church has a dearth of young men following Christ.

Get to know God today, and the Holy Spirit, who is sovereign, will direct young men to you to shepherd and mentor.

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