I thought about that and concluded that it’s wrong. A person’s true character is seen when they are under pressure and in front of others. It is this pressure that causes people to fold, lash out, or carry on resolutely. What I’ve come to realize about myself is that I don’t like my true character all that much simply because when I am under a great deal of pressure, I tend to lash out. I don’t necessarily lash out at others, although I’m sure if you were to ask them, they might say otherwise (due to my frustration at myself at the time). I am really lashing out at myself for not being able to push through the pressure to the other side of it.

The only true conclusion because of this is that I am not a humble man. I say that in all honestly because it needs to be admitted. I simply do not do well under pressure. My very being tenses up at new situations in which I do not feel I have the necessary strength to soldier on without allowing the situation to cause me undo alarm and growing stress. As I stated recently in the article, “Wrestling with God?“, instead of immediately submitting myself to Him for His care, guidance and ability to withstand the pressures of the situation that has arisen (as Moses and Aaron often did, as well as many others), I tend to almost immediately take that “fight” (from flight or fight), position ready to push back.